Why Women Love the Lifestyle

The saying goes, "You drag your wife by the hair to a swingers club, and then you have to drag her by the hair to get her out." And from more than one source, we've heard that women run the lifestyle. So, why is it that women embrace it and love it?

Plain and simple...it reminds us that we are beautiful and attractive, no matter our size, shape, color, lumps, and bumps. Even the most beautiful woman has something that she is insecure about and being in the lifestyle, there is always someone that will find them attractive...some more than others but bottom line, there's at least one other man out there that will find you attractive enough to boink.

Many of us are women who have gone through some kind of body transformation--be it child birth, surgery, weight gain/loss--and we want to be reaffirmed that we are still physically attractive. I know it sounds vain but when we are in a relationship, the compliments we receive from our significant other tends to feel forced or expected. When compliments come from a stranger, out of the blue, it seems more genuine. For example, Mr. Sunbuckus will compliment me whenever I take extra care to pretty myself up. As much as I love and appreciate the compliments, it almost always feels like he feels like he has to say them. In contrast, I can think of three separate occasions when I have been complimented unexpectedly and they are ones I will remember for a long time. One was when I was lying down, propping up my head up and gazing down at my partner and he suddenly said, "You're beautiful." Another time, was when Mrs. B (from our play couple) said, "[Mr. Sunbuckus] wants to play bareback with his gorgeous wife." And the third time was when Mr. B and I were talking about the hickeys I had given to him during our playtime. He was commenting on how those at work out tease him about them and he blame them on a vampire but then mentioned that he might slip up and say that a gorgeous Asian woman had left them on him. Those are the moments when compliments feel most sincere.

In the past, I have always questioned whether I was physically attractive. I have been obese most of my life and was never approached by a boy in school to go out on a date. In fact, Mr. Sunbuckus and I met online and fell in love. So, I have always wondered if I was able to physically attract anyone. Truth be told, I have even posted a picture of myself on Craigslist, just asking men if they found me attractive, nothing more. Most of the responses were reassuring but it didn't last very long and I would question myself again because pictures are one thing but in person, when the whole package is in front of someone is a different matter.

I am still insecure in how I appear. There are so many parts of my body that I am ashamed of that I can't list them all. I know that Mr. Sunbuckus will bed me because I'm his wife but it is encouraging to know that at least one other male out there is willing to play with me several times, even after he has seen the stretch marks, saggy skin, and extra baggage that my body bears.